Poets and song writers have sought to define marriage with the perfect words. But it seems that philosophers and comedians produce the best wedding wisdom. Here are a dozen great truisms of marriage, thanks to our friends at funnymarriageadvice.com:
“After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but still they stay together.” – Hemant Joshi
“Marriage is like a phone call in the night: first the ring, and then you wake up.” – Evelyn Hendrickson
“By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.” – Socrates
“Marriage is nature’s way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.” – Alan King
“Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.” – Henny Youngman
“Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.” – Anonymous
“I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then it was too late.” – Max Kauffmann
“A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.” – Zsa Zsa Gabor
“Women hope men will change after marriage but they don’t; men hope women won’t change but they do.” – Bettina Arndt
“Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it’s not so hot.” – Anonymous
“Marriage is a matter of give and take, but so far I haven’t been able to find anybody who’ll take what I have to give.” – Cass Daley
“Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” – Erma Bombeck
© Fourth Estate Audio, 2017 – Jay Congdon is president of Fourth Estate Audio, a professional Chicago DJ and Chicago Wedding DJ company.
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