What to Change for Your Second Wedding

Your first wedding was a young girl’s fairy tale fantasy. No expense was spared. Even the silliest indulgence was fulfilled. But now you’re headed back to the altar with a new perspective, new expectations and some valuable life experience. Here’s how to make your second wedding different — and better — than your first.

1. Make it your own. The first time, you didn’t know any better, and you let everyone manipulate you into putting their imprint on your wedding. This time, you’ll take more control of your planning, and tell all of those unsolicited advisers, “We’ve got this… it’s been handled.”
2. You have a different partner. Don’t try to relive your first wedding. This one is all new, and it should reflect your blended personalities, tastes and preferences.
3. There’s nothing wrong with going small. You’ve already done a wedding with a cast of thousands. This time, keep it intimate, with only a few dozen of your closest relatives and friends.
4. Make it a family affair. If you or your fiancée have children from an earlier marriage, showcase them in your ceremony and reception. Starting a whole new family is reason for celebration, and everyone in that family must know how cherished and essential they are.
5. Have some fashion courage. You don’t have to wear a pristine white gown this time. It doesn’t even have to be floor-length. You’re immune from all the traditions of a first wedding. Experiment with fashion, music, décor and special celebrations that show off your own unique awesomeness.
6. Skip the bouquet and garter tosses. Chances are, most of the people you know are now married, and the tosses are for single people. Instead, why not take the microphone and present your bouquet to someone who has inspired you throughout your life?
7. Consider a destination wedding. You probably have more money than you did when you planned your first wedding and honeymoon. If you have some close friends whose finances will allow it, why not invite them to share in a week-long celebration, culminating with your wedding ceremony? You can even host a reception back home for everyone else, and show video of your ceremony at your reception.
8. It takes two to plan a wedding. Neither one of you should make all of the decisions, because neither of you has all of the good ideas.  Gather all of your wedding wishes and decide together which of them to include. If either one of you doesn’t like a particular idea, throw it out.
9. Clear the air. This should really be the first essential of a second wedding. While you’re still dating, be very honest with one another about your earlier relationships, and even about the mistakes you made in those relationships. There’s no need to bad-mouth your ex. Once your fiancée knows all of your embarrassing secrets, and loves you anyway, you’re ready to begin a wonderful adventure together. 

To learn more about Fourth Estate Audio’s incomparable service, call me at 630.654.4440. I’m here to help.

© Fourth Estate Audio, 2015 – Jay Congdon is president of Fourth Estate Audio, a professional Chicago DJ and Chicago Wedding DJ company.  

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